Meet the Breeds!

Last weekend was a dog and cat exposition at the Javits Center called “Meet the Breeds”

SIR and i met up with a work colleague / friend and took in the sights and sounds of 160 different breeds of dogs and about 46 breeds of cat.

They had the usual booths set up for all types of pet products.  We went straight to the arena where the dogs were having relay races and then went to see all the different breeds of dog.

This bloodhound was very friendly and decided he wanted to be my friend … though he is looking at the cup of coffee very intently …

Holiday Eating Tips

1.  Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit.  in fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.

2.  Drink as much eggnog as you can.  And quickly.  It’s rare.  You cannot find it any other time of year but now.  So drink up!  Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip?  It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something.  It’s a treat.  Enjoy it.  Have one for me.  Have two.  It’s later than you think.  It’s almost Christmas!!

3.  If something comes with gravy, use it.  That’s the whole point of gravy.  Gravy does not stand alone.  Pour it on.  Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes.  Fill it with gravy.  Eat the volcano.  Repeat.

4.  As for the mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk.  If it’s skim, pass.  Why bother?  It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5.  Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating.  The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free.  Lots of it.  Hello?!?

6.  Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Years.  You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do.  This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog (see point 2).

7.  If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of a Santa, position yourself near them and don’t budge.  Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention.  They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes.  If you leave them behind, you’re never going to see them again.

8.  Same for pies.  Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat.  Have a slice of each.  Or if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin.  Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert?  Labour Day?

9.  Did someone mention fruitcake?  Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all costs.  I mean, have some standards.

10.  One final tip:  If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention.  Re-read tips:  start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

Office Stories

Story 1:

Last week we sent a presentation to a prospective client (or LP for Limited Partner as we call it at our firm) for a conference call on Monday night.  My boss approved the presentation put together by the analyst and I sent it off to the prospect via email before leaving Friday.  Copied on this email was the relevant department head who was also participating in the call.

Friday evening at around 10:00 pm we got an email from said department head.

“This is not what I had said to send out.  It has way too much information for the purposes of this call.”

Now we had all left for the evening of course and had adjourned to our respective locales.  All of us having blackberries, we all read the email on Friday night.  Read below the fold for our reactions as described on Monday, the resolution and another office story.

More Visitors!

Welcome to Manila, the Netherlands, Poland, Finland, and Malta…

Only continent that hasn’t visited yet is Africa …

Anglican Wine Bars .. No, it’s true!

We take a break from talking about politics and wincing at the theology of Southern Gospel to bring you this important announcement from the UK’s Telegraph … Graphic shamelessly stolen from Dr.Vino, to whom I am also giving a hat-tip….

Cathedral Turns to Wine Bars to Woo New Business

Now you can go to church, have coffee hour AND have brunch all in the same place! I hope someone told Dennis …

Dr. Vino writes, “If you’ve wanted to work for the Church of England but have felt constrained by the whole clergy thing, Birmingham Cathedral in England may have just the position for you: sommelier.“

Excerpts from The Telegraph say (emphasis mine, click on the link above for the whole article.

The first “director of hospitality and welcome” at an English cathedral has unveiled far-reaching plans to make its operations more business-like……His plans, revealed today, include a chain of city-centre wine bars and “loyalty cards” for regular worshippers to obtain discounts at the cathedral’s shops.  The new appraoch to attracting and retaining worshippers could become a blueprint for dioceses across the countr.  The wine bars would feature stained-glass windows, pictures on a religious theme and be decorated in “episcopal purple”.

Staff would have to be sympathetic to Christianity and times of cathedral services would be posted on the walls.  Mr Hope-Urwin said: “We’re not trying to encourage drinking, but the cathedral has to engage more with the city and find ways of meeting people on their territory.

“Cathedral wine bars should be seen as a potential commercial operation with profits going into the upkeep of the building and paying for evangelistic work… People have all kinds of distractions in their busy lives and at the moment too many just see the cathedral as a big brick monolith. That has to change if we are to bring people in.”

Except for the whole loyalty card business, this actually sounds kind of fun.

Oh! Oh! and wait!  There’s a traditional “orthodox” nay-sayer just waiting in the wings to point out just one more way the God’s Church is going to hell in a handbasket.

The Rev David Phillips, the general secretary of the Church Society, a traditionalist group, said: “Opening wine bars doesn’t seem an appropriate way to generate money.

“People who attend church should give more so that this doesn’t have to happen. The idea of the Church getting involved with selling alcohol will worry people.”

Oh, for the love of Mike … whatEVER Rev. Phillips.

Now here’s the fun part … Let’s come up with fun names for our favourite vintages at the church pub wine bar.  How about “De Vine and De Branch?”